(28.08.08)

This is a complete rant and maybe I'm just in a bad mood right now because my ... well ... just because -- it's not something I particularly want to share right now -- not with the whole world. Maybe I'll write about that on Facebook since I actually know (and like) everybody on there but anyway ...

I just saw the new Ne-yo video, "Miss Independent," and while I loooooove the video, it caused me to have a point of ponderance ... and later a thoughtful discussion with a friend of mine about the idea and concept of independence and independent women and we were talking about why it's suddenly become so "fashionable" to be independent and what independence really means and whether or not we were societal/economical snobs.

Remember not too long ago it was Destiny's Child singing, "Can you pay my bills?" Now Webbie and B-O-O-S-I-E are rapping about independent women and there's a plethora of songs and whatnot ... mostly by men.

What's with the movement?

It's not that I don't think it's awesome and encouraging for the focus to be put on women who are financially, emotionally, and spiritually independent but why now? Why haven't we (independent women) been pubicly embraced by men before? Why is it all of a sudden so many men have come forward with such non-misogynist songs? (i.e. "Woman," "Miss Independent," "Independent")

Perhaps Hillary has helped. Or maybe men are just tired of always footing the bill and finally demanding more by illustrating their appreciation of women and their strength.

Who knows. But that's not really the rant ... what my friend and I were discussing was why are so many women who aren't AT ALL independent, getting so crunk about it now that it's cool?

You all know exactly who I'm talking about. You can find them in the club getting all hype when Boosie and Webbie come on spelling out "I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T" knowing good and damned well that they haven't paid a bill on time EVER nor is their credit score in the triple digits and they're far from independent, claiming, "I got my own house, my own car, etc., etc.," when in reality, their housing is paid by section 8, their car note is paid to a "buy here, pay here" who doesn't report to a credit agency, let alone the trifecta, they are unhappy in their jobs -- making it paycheck to paycheck, and really, they're not at all independent ... financially, emotionally, and especially spiritually. Get the fuck outta here! Independent?! Please! *screwface*

But then again, I'm a snob ... I've come to accept that. I do own a house and a car -- free and clear. If I had to miss work for two weeks, my bills would be paid (and on time) ... my relationship with God is solid and I'm happy.

Ehhhh ... I guess maybe I don't understand what independence is or perhaps what it means to me, is not what it means to someone else. Who the heck knows.

What my bigger issue is though is how can one claim to be independent (man or woman) if one is not HAPPY?

Regardless of how much money one makes, how is it possible to claim independence if every other utterance out of one's mouth is a complaint about how "this nigga" this and that ... or how the boss is an asshole or whatever.

I mean, here I stand before you being a hypocrite ... complaining but I mean geez ... if whatever or wherever or whoever or however makes you unhappy, WHY NOT CHANGE IT?

If you dread going to work every morning, quit! Find your happiness and follow it. The money will follow. God will work it all out.

I am just tired of ...

Well ... fuck ... I'm just tired.

Ehhh ... I'm going to go find my happiness again and pray that I be forgiven for all my hateful thoughts right now.

That is all.

-Kornika